Breaking Even

       Breaking Even

Breaking, even
Is a picture of all I have left of you
You gave me so many days like the one there
You on your knees with a granddaughter
...

You takin me to Sears
Buyng me everything my heart desired
Mistaken I was making something more
Trying everything to start a fire
I always thought I could give it all back
But now I know
Love was never meant to be fair
Divided equitably
Investment insured and returned
Spanking dust off your hands, child
Debtless and doubtless
Of dying having done something to lift us higher
But too much is required
To ever even the endless grieving
The breaking even of this heart for yours.

- Colleen Lloyd
about Dad
Herschel  Dean Lloyd
February 24, 1993

Still I Dream of You

Colleen Lloyd shared Tammy Mendenhall's photo.

10 minutes ago

Still I dream of you
And try to slip into
The sweet ethereal
World where you appear
And you are always glowing golden
In your prime
Why do you keep coming back to love me now
When I left you behind and all the hurt
Another life ago
And I have let you go
Still I dream of you
I try to be sane and forgive us both for battling with wounded minds
So many years ago
And I thought that wound had healed
And closed
But still I dream of you

Colleen Lloyd
just now
Michael was haunting me in a good way again in the dream I just woke from

 

you are not to see this til after your run at 6am happy running

Under a Red Sky

Under a Red Sky

Verse 1

Walkin a Rocky Road by the River

As their dreams, they go hand in hand

Building a new life

A man and his young wife

He brought her there to share what was his father’s land

Verse 2

There’s a memory on the hill above the water

As the scarlet sun of spring is settin down

She’s sayin, within me lives your child

In his joy he smiled

And felt my heart beat with his that moment on

And I feel the good in them, in us goes on

Chorus

Under a red sky fading into purple and blue

While I’m fading into you

As twilight turns to day

Learnin just how to play

With all the fire in the red sky

With all the fire in the red sky

Verse 3

Silhouettes in scenes between the willows

His life’s work; to her, a work of art

Now she paints in that memory’s place

A shadow ‘cross his face

A pain big as a silver dollar in his heart

Verse 4

 Still it never stops them dancin around the kitchen

Years when all he can bring her is a coke

Still she stopped believing that his love

Was much more than enough

His head shook, I shoulda took a better road

What do you see in me I’ll never know

Chorus

I see a red sky fading into purple and blue

While I fade away with you

And though we turn to gray

The years can’t rain away

The desire in your sea green eyes

With all the fire in the red sky

Verse 5

Wintertime she returned to the River

As their dreams, he drifted away with the sand

(We all said) Of all the loves I’ve laid to rest

This man was the best

All my wrongs can’t undo the right he’s done

All he had to leave was just his daughter and his sons

Interlude ½ Chorus

Under a red sky -

Verse 6

Mama paint me a memory of tomorrow

Green and bright so I’ll know which way to go

As we spend another night

Lookin for his light

Cause it‘s too dim to make it down that Rocky Road

Verse 8

A woman’s tears are enough to fill the River

When he floats far too far before she finds

For the ones who can’t go back

And heal the heart’s attacks

All we can hope is Heaven’s heart will heal our minds

Pieces of the broken homes for the blind

Love picked up where it left off and left behind

Chorus

Under a red sky fading into purple and blue

While I’m waiting here for you

Though you’re a world away

I see you everyday

In all the fire in the red sky

Another red sky fading…

So when you turn away

I’ll fight to make you stay

With all the fire in the red sky

With all the fire in the red sky

With all the fire in the red sky

copyright© by Colleen-Lloyd