Escape Into My Own Consciousness

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DC4PcNEVAY0

Escape Into My Own Consciousness

             Escape into (my own) consciousness
             Sometimes it’s the only way
             It’s the only place
             Life takes place anyway.

LET the world revolve around me
Rather, certainly, than THEM.

Retain
Maintain
Identity
Your entity

             Don’t let them talk you into

                                         Insanity
                 In vanity
                 Is sanity

 

How you look at yourself

And what you do
Is your business
                               Don’t them make it theirs

You need

Privacy
To survive I see
It’s the only way



                                              My memory
                                              It’s them or me

(At times like this)
Vanity
Is sanity
This being at the center of my life.

                          ESCAPE!!
                          Into (my own) consciousness
                          Sometimes it’s the only way.

- Colleen Lloyd
about 20 years ago...

A Tower of Strength

A Tower of Strength

I don't want to be a tower of strength,
I want to be a woman.
I don't want to stand at the awards altar of the TV church
And be a survivor, in control of my emotions at my celebrated,
Long-awaited moment,
I don't want to be the Grand Coulee Dam.
I want to let them flow, to be overwhelmed, to let them happen to me
Like the Columbia River,
Along for the ride
Like I've been since a child.
I don't want to be a celebrity,
To live up to myself,
Be shot in the back,
To live up to someone else
Who's looking through my garbage.
And although I could
I don't want to be Audrey Hepburn
Picture-perfect, though she did it so well...
Rita Hayworth in her time will tell you the same thing.
And although how swell it would be to be Lucy
Or Bette Davis or Midler or Carol Burnett I'm sure it's hell
To be Colleen is all I ever wanted
And all I ever was
And all I ever will be.
A tower of strength.

-Colleen Lloyd
September 11, 1994
Las Vegas, Nevada